My best friend tried to kill himself. Slit his wrist deep enough to make the bones visible. Veins oozing blood like a miniature Niagara Fall only a little red in color and thicker. If it hadn’t been for a bystander who rushed him to the hospital he would have had a “Late” prefixed to his name right now.
Doctors later informed that if just 200ml more blood had been spilt, He would have lost enough to be brain dead. Not that they knew that people who take such measures don’t have one.
5 days of unconsciousness in the I.C.U and then a little movement. With a little flutter of his eyes he woke up…
When he awoke he seemed a little lost. I guess after 5 days of unconsciousness everything seems blurry, everything seems a little fake.
When I reached there, he was in the procedure of being resurrected again…I had to really hold myself back from violently shaking him and slapping him or in WWE terms choke-slamming him and saying “What the hell were you thinking Banta??” But as he lay there in such a miserable state I was filled with empathy tying to smile. His half-open tired eyes staring at the ceiling, his dry lips that seemed to shut him up and his weak body reminded me of what Nana Patekar’s skeleton would look like if you tried to lay it down on a bed and make it smile a little.
But why did he want to give it all up, maybe he had lost all hope in pursuing the woman he loved…he wanted out…he wanted out of this life where you are bound to protocols. A life, full of deceit, and mistrust. There lies a deep mysterious meaning to everything that’s done in life. You kind of ignite the flames of an invisible fire whenever you fall for someone. The fire engulfs everything that seems sane to you. You lose touch with yourself. It might seem bliss in the beginning. But it’s this very euphoric feeling that later gives rise to depression, nausea, and more depression. He didn’t understand what he was doing to himself until this happened.
I guess you don’t think much when you are in “Love”. You would do things that would otherwise seem insane to you. But yet people fall, and fall and then die……..!
Romeo, Devdas, and many others who cradled in the arms of the angel of death…..what did do of them have in common…..yep death at a very early stage…..just because they fell in “LOVEEE”……..WHY?????????????
Isn’t life too dear to lose it just for that selfish someone who thinks no end of oneself…..or did they try to change those special someones whom they were in “LOVEEE” so that they could control them or somehow adapt them to their own habitat…….I Think NOT…….
Every failed relationship is only because of immense love, immense Selfishness or immense Hatred…….!!
Yeah believe it…….Hate gives rise to “LOVEEE” somehow……..
But Sometimes you just cannot fathom what’s going on in your life…….Sometimes like a change over in a movie….the film reel keeps on rolling and nobody in the audience has a clue of what’s happening. Don’t you just feel lost sometimes? The feeling of giant hugs of loneliness just envelopes you even when you have everyone close to you. Sometimes it does make you want to question your existence, Doesn’t it?
Maybe, the sugar-coated definition of this may be that you’re in love…..but basically you need medical attention for bouts of insomnia, head-aches……….or you just need to lighten up a bit and not think much!
All I’m trying to say here is that…………never love someone that your whole life is dependent on them…………..Love is a garnered emotion………you learn a lot from it……..from different people……..
So stop being perfect or try to behave overly with the ones you have feelings for ……! Stop making your life Hell to make someone else’s a seventh heaven!
