Asphixiation

This pain seems blissful, I am being smothered but there is a sense of completeness.
A momentous fulfillment of my immediate gold to punish myself. Have I really found myself? Or am I just drifting away?

This interrogation has tormented me all throughout and would continue to cradle me in its arms. It would take a part of me. Confuse, consume and constrict me. I wanna see my face staring back at me with all those scars and the blood dripping all over me. I want to hurt myself and test the limits of how far my rational and physical being can swallow.

Everyday is War. The ground smells of dried blood and guts of the previous day’s massacre. The drumbeats are in the background as the ground trembles underneath my feet as I enter the battlefield. Flesh and wounds all over. Would the Gods hear me out as I crave for the will to stand upright and fight? Or would I be left alone with only my dignity and hope to pull me through?

Everytime I look up to the sky I see no Sun. The clouds seem like a gargantuan blemish on the velvety blue sky. The tormentors are upon me with their feisty swords and cancerous daggers. I fend with all my might, in the process making them bite the dust. But the battle rages on. Infinity has no bounds. Everyday I rise to face a new battle with new tormentors. Most of them engraved into my mind in the orifice of my consciousness.

The mind demons are the worse, forcing you to make believe what isn’t. Do them have a script to which im bound to perform, I’d never know.
But one things for certain things only happen what are destined to happen and nothing can change that. The supreme power up above governs every move, every breath, every step, and a part of it in ingrained in me, all righteousness!